unmiserablecleveland.com

  • is so unmiserable it hurts.
  • is the city that sleeps just the right amount.
  • is plum happy to be here.
  • loves Taco Tuesdays.
  • is a bothsider.
  • bikes to work every day. Yes, even in winter.
  • doesn't get cold in winter, just awesome.
  • plays by the lake.
  • loves CLE Critical Mass.
  • would love to see a Euclid Beach Park rebirth.
  • can't get enough of one of the world's best orchestras.
  • = way rad.
  • has no grassy knoll (but some pretty incredible Metroparks).
  • loves plums.
  • wants a bratwurst from the West Side Market.
  • was made in 216. Really.
  • is so happy city enthusiasm has made the Cleveland Marathon a race to be reckoned with.
  • doesn't know if $2-burger night at Muldoon's can be beat for a sweet Thursday tradition.
  • thinks the river caught fire just to get your attention.
  • appreciates enthusiasm.
  • hearts long walks on wholly underrated beaches.
  • will try Lake Erie surfing this fall.
  • would host the Olympics, but is a little busy right now.
  • would never be a free agent.
  • loves you too.
  • is home.
  • can't pick a best pizza because they're all pretty damned good.
  • enjoys having all four seasons.
  • plays outside in winter and summer.
  • rides a bike to work.
  • needs to visit A Christmas Story house (again) this year.
  • understands there's so much yet to do.
  • loves it here.
  • high-fives others who love it here too.
  • gets the veggie dog with chorizo chili.
  • enjoys rainy days at the art museum.
  • thinks Ian Hunter rocks as well.
  • believes in the power of innerburbs, uptowns and downtowns.
  • gets excited whenever How I Met Your Mother refers to Ted's NEO origins.
  • believes Liz Lemon actually does heart Cleveland as much as we do.
  • wouldn't mind the return of streetcars.
  • loves to travel the world and then come home to the best place in it.
  • owns, perhaps, too many shirts that mention a love for the city.
  • could probably make a killer plum pudding.
  • always knows which way is north.
  • is really pumped about Collinwood and Gordon Square going awesome.
  • likes to ride the bus all over town.
  • has so much to say.
  • should be in movies, don't you think?
  • will host a bread-pudding tour of Cleveland this fall.
  • has never been to a wig shop, but could tell you where to find one.
  • has a big lake as its backyard.
  • can totally swim to Canada.
  • kayaks the Cuyahoga.
  • wants to make you so freakin' unmiserable you cry. Happy tears.
  • loves Boston cream pie and plans to spark the 2012 revolution that changes its name.
  • feels a little too happy about Presti's bringing back doughnuts.
  • puts the eastside-westside battle aside.
  • crosses the river.
  • sees smart people.
  • has access to some pretty serious health care.
  • doesn't have to pretend getting ripped off on rent is OK.
  • loves architecture.
  • is home to an impressive collection of universities and other higher ed institutions.
  • digs a grid system.
  • loves all of NEO equally. Mostly.
  • thinks you choose to be happy (or not).
  • believes in the magic of a good bread pudding.
  • feels no shame in loving polka.
  • has been to the Cleveland-style Polka Hall of Fame.
  • hearts polkamaster DJ Kishka.

What a Wednesday

All this looking ahead to Thursday’s Midtown Chowdown and Kinsman/Central bike ride has totally made me overlook Wednesday. And what a Wednesday indeed.

Walnut Wednesday
It’s starts with your weekly Walnut Wednesday noshfest downtown, featuring a collection of mobile food eats from your favorite grub trucks.

Hit Walnut and East 9th between 11:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. (But don’t fill up too much — Midtown Chowdown is a must-do for Thursday!)

Community Solutions Dialogue
If you’re a Heights community member (or just an interested neighbor), the Heights Community Congress is hosting a community dialogue on Wednesday night at the Heights Library (2345 Lee Road) from 7-9 p.m.

Wade Oval Wednesday The discussion will cover recent incidents in the Heights involving diversity issues, flash mobs and troublesome young people, as the broad range of emotion and reaction by community leaders, officials, police, business owners and the general public.

The program aims to get your answers to one big, hot question: how can the community work with the youth population to create a positive, safe and productive environment for everyone? Bring your thinking caps and open minds. It’s free and open to the public.

Fushi
It’s going on at Touch Supper Club. And evidently it’s a bit of a surprise. What is Fushi? Well, whatever it is, it’s happening from 5 p.m. – 2 a.m. So, if you’re in the know or into surprises, stay tuned to the Fushi event page for more info.

Wade Oval Wednesday
Free music offering numero uno: the Speedbumps, from Kent, take the Wade Oval stage in University Circle, as part of this party-in-the-park series.

Next week features Irish-Celtic band New Barleycorn. Plus, it’s movie night with The Karate Kid.

Bring a blanket, your family/friends, a picnic or bucks for vendor food, and your dancing shoes. The party rocks 6-9 p.m. each week until Aug. 31. See the Wade Oval Wednesdays page for bands, movies and more info.

Rock Hall Free Show
Summer in the City live concert series is your free-music option number two. Wednesday night’s drops a hip-hop beat with a line-up that features Das Racist and two Cleveland-based bands: Smoke Screen and Muamin Collective.

I’m not going to lie: I discovered Das Racist a couple years ago when my friend Jersey-City friend Dan force-fed us “Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell.”

Then I got hooked. Yes, on CPHTB and plenty of their other, more solid tunes. I’m so there. And while I haven’t seen Smoke Screen or Muamin Collective, I’m checking out MySpace music pages now and thinking this show will be a good one. It starts at 7 p.m.

Beachland Ballroom and Tavern
Rounding out the musical trifecta: Beachland Ballroom‘s Wednesday night jam with Orgone, a sizzling-hot, Los Angeles-based funk, soul and hip-hop group. Take a listen to some Orgone tunes. Zoogma, whom they say combines the sonic diversity and precision of a DJ with the excitement and immediacy of a five piece rock group, opens. Bound to be one helluva jammin’ night. Plus, it gets you to Collinwood, which you know you should visit more often anyway. Doors open at 8 p.m. Show starts at 9 p.m. Tickets are $12.

Speaking of Beachland: make it back to the ballroom on Thursday for a free show and jam session with Northeast Ohio Drum and Music Jam. It’s a fun, casual gathering for all ages and music-minded folk who want to make tunes and have a swell time. Doors open at 8:30 p.m. Jam starts at 9 p.m.

Our Lady of Mount Carmel West Italian Festival
What’s summer without Italian festivals? Our Lady of Mount Carmel (6928 Detroit Ave) kicks off its summer festival on Wednesday with carnival rides, games and casino stops, nighttime entertainment, raffles and, of course, Italian food. The festival runs through July 17.

The church will hold a mass and lead the Procession of Saints through the neighborhood, beginning at 11:30 a.m. on Sunday. Don’t miss it.